Is there such

thing as levels in relationships? lets not look at love specifically. in general, like friends and colleagues. what i learned in psychology is that you have to learn to reveal things about yourself as the relationship progresses. its funny. how can you tell where the relationship is? and it also says that the information has to be of the same level. meaning, what ever the other person revealed about himself/herself, we need to share the same thing about ourselves of the same level. realllyyyy confusing.

well of course some of you gets it but its not that im wondering about. its mostly about the progress of a relationship. how do you know how far you are in a relationship? how long have you have to wait till you're on the other stage. it scares me and at the same time, it makes me think. try two people who has just started seeing each other. take for example, from movies. the main actor and actress just started seeing each other. now i learned that most guys go for girls for immediate satisfaction while the girl goes for long term. put it in this way, the way these two people think is different. how do you expect to know what "level" you are in now with the person you are having an interpersonal relationship with?

so i came up with a theory that, the level of relationship is not trust nor time. people think the longer you are in the relationship, the higher the "level" of relationship. some think that if you trust a person, you start revealing things about yourself to them.but what about arranged marriages? how do you think the create such an intimate relationship when they don't even know each other then suddenly BAM! MARRIED! trust too can't be the reason why you reveal things about yourself to people you have a relationship with. the thing is, people lie. and what if the lie you created was to cover up your own true self that you don't want the other person to find out. furthermore, after you told the other person your lie, they revealed something that associates with your lie but its the truth. therefore, its not the same since disclosed a lie about yourself to the other person while the other person disclosed a truth.

after much thought given, the reason we self disclose is because of insecurities. the total opposite of trust. two person usually have the same amount of insecurities that they keep from each other, rather than having the same amount of trust for each other. i don't want to bore you with facts so i'm just gonna end this one with a rhetorical questions. "Is 'Can you keep a secret?' a cliche in any new relationship?